I wanted to share all the things we have been blessed with after the Loss of Isaac.  I had a couple friends give me some very sweet gifts to put in his Memory Box.  I haven't gotten a box yet.  Just not not ready to do it.

But I want to share pictures of the gifts we received.  We didn't get anything with Sweet Pea, but I guess people view it differently because we lost him/her at 7 weeks, as where we lost Isaac at 15 1/2 weeks. 

And that's another thing.  Why is it different to people when you lose your baby at 5 weeks or 19 weeks.  There isn't a difference!  A baby is a baby no matter when you lose the baby.  Yes, for me losing my baby at 16 weeks was harder than at 7 weeks.  Maybe it was also that I had been through it 14 weeks before.  But it was harder for me the farther along I was.  But for people to judge and decide that if you lose your baby at 5 weeks you don't need the same love, support, and understanding then someone who loses their baby at 15, 16, or 20 weeks is just wrong.  We all need love, support, and understanding that we're hurting and grieving a baby we will never see.

Now moms that lose a baby after 20 weeks and have to have a funeral, I just can't imagine.  I was grateful that we didn't have to do that.  I am not sure I would be able to get through that.  But there shouldn't be a rule based  on when they lose their baby.  Everyone needs it and people should continue to be there for them until the mom is ready to move on.  Not just because people think they should be ready to move on.  It is so painful to see people just fading away when they start to forget your loss, their lives get to busy to check in, and so on.  They have all the excuses in the world not to keep caring.  It wasn't there baby, it wasn't their family.  And even family just quites caring too.  And let me tell you it sucks!!  To know that people don't care anymore, and they can't be bothered to ask you how your doing anymore (and if they do, they really don't want to really know).

It is very frustrating to live in a world with people who are so self-aborsed.  It happens at church too.  Our church family starts to forget and not care anymore.  They don't ask, they don't call, they stop emailing.  They just expect you to move on and get over it.  When you ask for prayer because the "due date" is coming and Christmas is coming, they don't seem to get the pain your feeling.  It isn't the same as losing a parent, friend, or another family member.  A child is something so different.  The pain is something unimaginable.   To me, the only thing harder than grieving a child is losing a spouse. 

I have a friend that lost her husband almost 2 years ago.  I can't imagine that!  She has 2 children, around early teenagers.  She amazes me, with her strength.  She sent me a Christmas Card this year.  The 1st one I have ever gotten from her.  She sent it because she knew I am grieving the loss of my baby.  She doesn't know yet about Sweet Pea.  It touched my heart so very much!!  It made me cry that in her pain of celebrating her 2nd Christmas without her Husband, she was thinking of me.  That is a true Christian person.  And I believe people could learn allot from her!

So that is my rant for now. Here are the pictures of the gifts we were given.

This was a prayer blanker I was given by a lady in my Bible Study group.  I was pregnant with Isaac and it was when I started bleeding at 5 1/2 weeks and put on bed rest.

It had 3 different verses on it.

My good friend, Chaunnessey, gave me this little baby doll.  It is a very special baby.  It is about the size Isaac would have been at about 14 weeks.  It is so precious!

I wanted to show just how small this baby is.  The paper is a normal 8 X 13 inch paper.  The baby is just so small.

My friend, Tessa, gave me a special box a couple days before we would have taken Isaac.  We had taken a friendship break because she was pregnant.  And it was just too hard for me to see her and know she was pregnant.  But even though I had asked her for a break, she still loved me enough to give us something so special.

This was a little card, my friend Tessa gave me.  I'll write what was in it at the end of this post.  It made me cry.

A cross for Isaac from Tessa

A Burp Cloth for Isaac, from Tessa.  It has Isaac's name and birthday on it.

A close up view.

My friend Karen, had made a Baby Blanket for Isaac when I was pregnant.  When we found out we lost Isaac she gave the blanket she made for him, to her daughter.  She asked if I would like a smaller version of the blanket.  And of course I said yes.   She also wrote a poem to go with it.  I'll add the poem at the end of the post as well.

We figured this would have been big enough to wrap Isaac in.  I put it on the same paper as the baby.  Just to give you an idea on how small the blanket is.

This is the poem that my friend Tessa, wrote in the card.   It was so beatuiful and made me cry.

When little ones leave us we seem to think,

Their lives were somehow incomplete,

Yet, we may not see the role they play

In helping someone else see the way.

Who knows what blessing their life may bring,

Though seemingly such a tragic thing.

For maybe some lost soul will see

His deperate need of Calvary.

This A mom might begin to reasure her role

As she realizes her investment in a soul.

Maybe a dad will spend more time

Making memories versus spending a dime.

Maybe a sibling will stop to pray

Before choosing unkind words to say.

Maybe hurt feelings will begin to mend

To secure their bond with a friend.

Who knows the impact a life can make;

There is purpose for Heaven's sake.

So though we hate to say goodbye;

We know that Jesus now holds you nigh!

This is the poem my friend, Karen, wrote to go along with the blanket she made for Isaac's special box.

“Unraveled”

Written by Karen

Once there was a ball of yarn that started perfect as can be,

Purchased to make a gift for a little baby yet to be.

The maker started crocheting an afgan; made with love and from the heart,

Only to discover that the yarn’s threads had unraveled apart.

Once there was a baby, who started perfect as can be.

He was prayed for and deeply longed for; to be part of a special family tree.

The Maker was knitting the baby together in his mother’s womb, right from the start,

Only to discover the ceasing of the little child’s beating heart.

Once there was a baby who was planned for with faith, hope and a prayer

Planned for by his parents, who could not wait to have him there.

The Maker’s plans were different than what all would have hoped,

For plans for the baby’s arrival soon unraveled like a rope.

For when life’s plans unravel and things won’t turn out like we thought they should,

Our Maker’s ever planning to work all things for our good.

For our Maker is the one who takes every unraveled part

And, is the only one who can mend all that has unraveled, even a broken heart.

Christi