How can it be?

How can it be that almost 7 months ago, I said goodbye to Isaac Nathaniel?  And it's been almost 4 months since I said goodbye to Sweet Pea. 

It just doesn't feel like it's been that long.  With somethings 4 and 7 months don't feel long.  But when it comes to losing a baby 4 and 7 months are like a lifetime.  And I don't know how it's gone by so fast. 

I miss my Isaac and Sweet Pea so very much.  I know that they are having a blast, but it doesn't help the pain of missing them.

The other night, I was reading my book for my bible study with my Life Group at church.  It was on Psalm 139.  It is the verse about how we are wonderfully and fearfully made.  We were suppose to answer the questions about how we were made.  But instead, I kept thinking about my sweet babies.  I kept thinking about how God made them, and they never got to finish being made, before God allowed them to go back to Heaven.  They never had the chance to fully growing before they left.  They never got to do much of anything.

But the one thing they were both able to do before they left, was steal my heart.   I loved both Isaac and Sweet Pea the second that test came out positive.  I love them now.  I will always love them!  They are my babies.  They may be very far away, but they will always be a part of my life.

I will NEVER feel bad for talking about them.  If you ask me how many kids I have, I will always answer 7.  I have 7 babies.  I delivered 7 babies.  I conceived 7 babies.  I have the right to say I have 7 babies.  And I will not allow anyone to make me feel bad or like it's not ok to include Isaac and Sweet Pea.  I don't expect or want people's pity.  I just want you to know, I have 7 babies. 

So, I guess that is it for now.

Christi